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Kannon Zendo Los Alamos, NM
(Last Updated May 09, 2010)
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FIRE GATE OF HEALING: A Father's Buddhist Journey from Suicide to Service
TABLE OF CONTENTS
PART I – NARRATIVE
PROLOGUE -- A Glimpse of Happier Times
POEM -- MOON-FACED BUDDHA: A Requiem
CHAPTER I – IMPACT
CHAPTER 2 – ABYSS Signs of Trouble Descent
CHAPTER 3 – THE ROOTS OF SORROW Why Understand Past Causes? Family Origins of Suffering My Own Background of Sorrow Influences within My Own Family Developments and Difficulties for Chris in Vermont Concluding Assessment
CHAPTER 4 -- BACK FROM THE EDGE Clinic Transitions Mid-Atlantic Ridge Extended Grief Work Signs of Healing Reconstruction Begins
CHAPTER 5 – OVERCOMING BARRIERS TO HEALING Illness and Fragmentation Decline of the Hidden Mountain Zen Center Issues of Teacher Misbehavior and Accountability Breakthrough: Finding My “Yearning Creature”
CHAPTER 6 -- LETTING GO AND SEEING THE STRUCTURE OF DELUSIONThe Process of Learning to Let GoAccessing Unconscious Emotional Structures Seeing My Own Structure of Grief Resulting Insights & New Directions
CHAPTER 7 -- CULTIVATING PEACE & RETURNING TO LIFE Ongoing Practice and Healing Four Poems Transitional Openings into Freedom The Dance of Relative and Absolute
PART II – TEACHINGS & HEALING PRACTICES
CHAPTER 8 -- THE TRUTH OF SUFFERING Three Pillars of Strong Practice The Importance of Intention and Choice Relevant Healing Practices Coping with Immediate Dangers Finding Social Support Knowing You’re Not Alone
CHAPTER 9 -- ORIGINS OF SUFFERING Teachings on the Origin of Suffering The Construct of Self or the I-System Impermanence and No-Self Frustrated Desires & Suffering Being Stuck in “Samsara” Relevant Healing Practices Educating Yourself Self-Expression A Tool for Emotional Crisis
CHAPTER 10 -- INSIGHTS INTO THE SELF-ORIGINS OF SUFFERING Self as a Trap Cause and Effect in Buddhism Zen’s “Frontal Assault” Approach Gentler Approaches The Challenge of Getting Unstuck Relevant Healing Practices Why Meditation? How to Begin Meditating Overcoming the Traditional Barriers The Importance of Physical Awareness
CHAPTER 11-- ENTERING THE FIRE GATE OF HEALING Entering the Fire Gate More on the Importance of Intention The Healing Power of Mindfulness Meditation Developing Strong Meditative Concentration & Mindfulness The “Warrior Spirit” Relevant Healing Practices Overcoming Common Barriers to Getting Unstuck Focusing Mindfulness on the Afflictive Emotions Intensifying the Lens of Mindfulness Exercises for Working with Afflictive Emotions Accessing Dark Emotions Via Body Meditations
CHAPTER 12 – HEALING, EMOTIONAL ALCHEMY, AND THE STRUCTURE OF SUFFERING Clearly Seeing the Realities of Our Condition Schemas The Nature of HealingThe Process of Healing: Dissolving the Bonds of Reactivity Emotional Alchemy Relevant Healing Practices Interrupting Automatic Reactions Long-Term Practice Cultivating Wholesome Emotions
CHAPTER 13 -- LETTING GO INTO TRANSFORMATION Preparations for Letting Go Facing the Truth about Self The Transition The Challenge of Fundamental Letting Go Aspects of Liberation Relevant Healing Practices Everyday Mindfulness Techniques for Letting Go Re-taking One’s Bearings
CHAPTER 14 -- DISCOVERING GROUNDLESSNESS & FORGETTING THE SELF Formless Forms of Meditation Deeper Letting Go Forgetting the Self Discovering Groundlessness Returning to Ordinary Life Feeling the Pain of Others Endless Practice: Continuing the Dance Independently
PART III – SUMMARY, BIBLIOGRAPHY & SHORT BIOGRAPHY
CHAPTER 15 – SUMMARY OF HEALING PRACTICES AND EXERCISES Bibliography & Recommended Readings About the Author
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